The Bellman’s Rule

A Map for Boris Johnson’s Supporters

https://t.co/zjThtOIbP5

001　“Just the place for a Snark!” the Bellman cried,
002 　As he landed his crew with care;
003　Supporting each man on the top of the tide
004 　By a finger entwined in his hair.

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

005　“Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:
006 　That alone should encourage the crew.
007　Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
008 　What I tell you three times is true.”

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

https://t.co/VqsowjT3A6

093　He had bought [from Cummings] a large map representing the sea,
094 　Without the least vestige of land:
095　And the crew were much pleased when they found it to be
096 　A map they could all understand.

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

An here is the Bellman's map: https://t.co/c0OG29IHIA pic.twitter.com/CCWDZiqpOa

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

097　“What’s the good of Mercator’s North Poles and Equators,
098 　Tropics, Zones, and Meridian Lines?”
099　So the Bellman would cry: and the crew would reply
100 　“They are merely conventional signs!

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

101　“Other maps are such shapes, with their islands and capes!
102 　But we’ve got our brave Captain to thank:
103　(So the crew would protest) “that he’s bought us the best—
104 　A perfect and absolute blank!”

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

105　This was charming, no doubt; but they shortly found out
106 　That the Captain they trusted so well
107　Had only one notion for crossing the ocean,
108 　And that was to tingle his bell.

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

109　He was thoughtful and grave—but the orders he gave
110 　Were enough to bewilder a crew.
111　When he cried “Steer to starboard, but keep her head larboard!”
112 　What on earth was the helmsman to do?

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

113　Then the bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes:
114 　A thing, as the Bellman remarked,
115　That frequently happens in tropical climes,
116 　When a vessel is, so to speak, “snarked.”

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

117　But the principal failing occurred in the sailing,
118 　And the Bellman, perplexed and distressed,
119　Said he had hoped, at least, when the wind blew due East,
120 　That the ship would not travel due West!

-> https://t.co/brWZiWUkIq pic.twitter.com/UgoGsUapDV

— Snark Sesquicentennial (@Snark150) December 8, 2019

Praise Trump!

On 2019-01-27 President Donald J. Trump retweeted @ChatByCC’s praise from 2018-12-07. I added some more tweets from this strong Trump supporter to the retweeted tweet.

7 Dec 2018

Strong people stand up for themselves—but stronger people stand up for others.

Thank you President @realDonaldTrump for standing up for America. pic.twitter.com/a1xGSDYQVz

— CC (@ChatByCC) December 7, 2018

BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!

— CC (@ChatByCC) January 23, 2019

TWEETS FROM PARROTS FED WITH CARROTShttps://t.co/41m74hVQUK

— Goetz Kluge (@Bonnetmaker) January 24, 2019

Additionally to CC's contributions, I add a program which shows that Trump's slogan "BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL" is true. pic.twitter.com/IGPUl3oxBF

— Goetz Kluge (@Bonnetmaker) January 27, 2019

Actually, it is the unique poetry of the the President of the United States, which significantly contributes to making America great again: "BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"https://t.co/nTO4JZyLhk

— Goetz Kluge (@Bonnetmaker) January 27, 2019

Donald Trump, the Poet, 2016-04-06, by Robin Lakoff

TWEETS FROM PARROTS
FED WITH CARROTS

2018-01-23 07:48 EST

Great unity in the Republican Party. Want to, once and for all, put an end to stoppable crime and drugs! Border Security and Wall. No doubt!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 23, 2019

2018-01-23 07:57 EST

BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL! This is the new theme, for two years until the Wall is finished (under construction now), of the Republican Party. Use it and pray!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 23, 2019

2018-01-23 07:59 EST

BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 23, 2019

2018-01-23 08:13 EST

BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!
BUILD A WALL
& CRIME WILL FALL!

— CC (@ChatByCC) January 23, 2019

2018-01-24 08:43 EST

TWEETS FROM PARROTS FED WITH CARROTShttps://t.co/41m74hVQUK

— Goetz Kluge (@Bonnetmaker) January 24, 2019

Application: The Bellman’s Rule

#! /usr/bin/haskell
import Data.List
statementList :: [String]
statementList =
["BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"I am a stable genius!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"1+1=2"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"I am a stable genius!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"I am a stable genius!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
,"BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!"
]
atLeastThrice :: [String] -> [String]
atLeastThrice sL =
[head grp | grp <-
group $ sort sL, length grp >= 3]

Result (if loaded and executed in GHCi):

*Main> atLeastThrice statementList
["BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!","I am a stable genius!"]

Interpretation: “BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!” and “I am a stable genius!” are true, because both assertions appeared at least three times. Actually, “BUILD A WALL & CRIME WILL FALL!” is double-plus-true, because all letters have been capitalized and because the assertion ends with an exclamation mark.

Search "BUILD THE WALL" and "CRIME WILL FALL" in @realDonaldTrump:https://t.co/r4vMrX6yrf

Search "BUILD THE WALL" and "CRIME WILL FALL" in @GOP:https://t.co/upeVJ9zgeO

Why doesn't the GOP use Trumps theme?https://t.co/HULCiKMnxT

— Goetz Kluge (@Bonnetmaker) January 25, 2019

“But the principal failing occurred in the sailing”

I reshuffled some lines of The Hunting of the Snark a bit:

“Just the place for a Snark!” the Bellman cried,
As he landed his crew with care;
Supporting each man on the top of the tide
By a finger entwined in his hair.

“Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:
That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
What I tell you three times is true.”

Then the bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes:
A thing, as the Bellman remarked,
That frequently happens in tropical climes,
When a vessel is, so to speak, “snarked.”

But the principal failing occurred in the sailing,
And the Bellman, perplexed and distressed,
Said he had hoped, at least, when the wind blew due East,
That the ship would not travel due West!

This was charming, no doubt; but they shortly found out
That the Captain they trusted so well
Had only one notion for crossing the ocean,
And that was to tingle his bell.

Meme!

No Collusion

The Bellman’s rule: “What I tell you three times is true!”

Kelly Ramsdell Fineman told us …

… that President Theodore Roosevelt and Edith Wharton were huge fans of the Snark. On one visit to the White House, Wharton learned of the following exchange that occurred between the President and the Secretary of the Navy (undoubtedly unaware of Carroll’s poem, or at least unaware that Roosevelt was quoting):

During discussion, Roosevelt said to the secretary of the Navy,

“Mr. Secretary, what I tell you three times is true!”

The Secretary replied stiffly,

“Mr. President, it would never for a moment have occurred to me to impugn your veracity.”

So far for three times. But 16 times is fine too:

Trump sat for 30 minutes at his golf club with the Times. He said “no collusion” 16 times https://t.co/BOwHyvlCUb

— Amy Fiscus (@amyfiscus) December 29, 2017

001 “Just the place for a Snark!” the Bellman cried,
002 As he landed his crew with care;
003 Supporting each man on the top of the tide
004 By a finger entwined in his hair.

005 “Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:
006 That alone should encourage the crew.
007 Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
008 What I tell you three times is true.”

329 “’Tis the voice of the Jubjub!” he suddenly cried.
330 (This man, that they used to call “Dunce.”)
331 “As the Bellman would tell you,” he added with pride,
332 “I have uttered that sentiment once.

333 “’Tis the note of the Jubjub! Keep count, I entreat;
334 You will find I have told it you twice.
335 ’Tis the song of the Jubjub! The proof is complete,
336 If only I’ve stated it thrice.”

The Bellman’s Rule is stated in Lewis Carroll’s The Hunting of the Snark, line #7 and line #335. I said it in Lua – wrote it in Python, I made that indeed, but I wholly forgot (when finally done), that Haskell is what you need! So, here is an example for how to implement that rule:

Result (if loaded and executed in GHCi):

*Main> atLeastThrice statementList
["Collusion is not a crime.","I am a stable genius!","No collusion."]

meme4trump 1 | meme4rtrump 2